The whole aim and purpose of human existence is to live a life of happiness and meaning. This has hold truth from the beginning of time. What else then is the true purpose of life, if not to live a happy life until you die?
Happiness is the most sought-after goals in life, yet for many, it seems to be elusive. It’s easy to delude ourselves into thinking, “oh well, when I get that nice house or a new car and some more money in my bank account, then I can be happy.” But in reality, happiness is available to all of us, right now.
Read on here are six ways you can create a happy and fulfilling life hope you find them to be helpful.
Self-love is one of the most important things a person can do to live a joyful, meaningful and satisfying life. Yet most people do not know this or if they do, they seem to find it cheesy, akin to vanity and selfishness or a moral flaw.
Self-love is the foundation for a flourishing life. It is being able to think of yourself and your own well-being first. Most times we get caught up in putting everyone else’s needs first. Those of our children, spouse, parents, relatives and friends, and never taking a moment for ourselves, then eventually we become a drain and have nothing else left to give, not even to ourselves. You must take a breather and recharge yourself. If not, its a recipe for disaster. Go ahead take that relaxing bath and put your feet up for a change.
Treat yourself to that massage you have been putting off for the last two years, and get a pedicure/manicure while you are at it. Go for a walk in the park, get some fresh air. Order take out.
Last but definitely not the least “it’s okay to say no or not right now” sometimes, you’re not being selfish but engaging in self-preservation. So put yourself first! Do not feel guilty about it, because, in order to love others and be loved, you have to love yourself first.
Listen to yourself less and talk to yourself more. The voices in our head have been there from the day we were born, and have been nurtured and groomed as we grow and develop by what we were taught and how we were socialized. By what our parents, friends, relatives, grandparents and by society on a whole.
Our learned behaviors whether they be negative or positive will ultimately manifest themselves in our lives, often times in a negative way. And we judge and criticize ourselves in the most unmerciful way for the slightest shortcomings or flaws. I’m so dumb, I’m too fat, too tall, too short, my nose is too big or I’m not good at anything. Whilst these are not true but because we tell ourselves these things so often they become a reality.
By the virtue of being human we all have some degree of insecurity. Perfection is not a natural state so quit striving for it and cut yourself some slack.
3) Have a growth mindset
Our mindset is the most powerful and fundamental aspect of our life, think of it as a voice it can be a limiting or a positive one. How we think and live our life’s is based on our beliefs and what we tell ourselves. The way in which we think and speak to ourselves is a direct correlation to our mindset, in essence, our life is really govern by our mindset.
According to Professor Carol Dweck, when a person has a fixed mindset, they believe that their basic abilities, intelligence, and talents are fixed traits. The fixed mindset says, “you are not good enough, Are you sure you want to do this?” You don’t have the talent or skills”. “you are going to look stupid.” “They are going to laugh at you”.
However, a person with a growth mindset, believe their abilities and intelligence can be developed with effort, learning and persistence. The growth mindset says, “embrace challenges, persist in the face of a setback,”, “i can learn anything i want to”, “learn from criticism”, “find lesson and inspiration in the success of others”.
Therefore when it comes to that limiting voice in our head ( i tend to call it ”the small voice”), feel free to talk back as you like in response. Tell that voice exactly what is wrong with how it’s framing the situations, and actively reformulate your approach to challenges and setbacks to reflect a belief in personal growth.
4) Practice Gratitude
“The quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness”.
Be grateful! Giving thanks create positive energy which is very powerful in our lives. It is the way we speak to life and the universe about who we are. Give thanks for everything, “food on the table”, “shoes on your feet”, “clean running water”, your children, spouse, relatives, friends”, “your health”. Just gives thanks even if you do not have all that you want.
When we focus on something it expands. Whether you are being negative or positive once you focus your time and energy on that, this is what will continue to grow and multiply in your life. Therefore do not focus on the negative things and what you do not have in your life. Quit complaining! Develop and show a spirit of gratitude, not that you are satisfied with what you have but you are being grateful for what you’ve got.
5) Treat yourself
We all need to treat ourselves good! Not on a once in a while basis, when you are feeling in the mood or on a whim.
And, surely not by eating a jug of i-cream and a whole box of chocolate. But by doing the things that are good for your spiritual, physical and, mental well-being.
Make them daily habits, Why wait for the next special occasion?
If you do not treat yourself good, who else will? So remind yourself that you are special and deserve to live a happy, fulfilling life by enjoying yourself on a daily basis. These can be free or inexpensive things, so there’s no excuse for not showing yourself some love! By doing these little things you will be fulfilled in a good way which will boost your positive energy, self- esteem and your mood in general.
- Give yourself the precious gift of five minutes of doing nothing, take a breather sometimes that’s all you need to clear your head and formulate a plan for your next move.
- Reach out to someone else, a friend, family or relatives. It’s okay to ask for help and a little support goes a far away.
- Make a healthy drink sit back and enjoy it slowly. Go for a pedicure/manicure or give yourself one. Make plans for the weekend, therefore you have something to look forward to.
- Read a self-help book or blog articles. Listen to interesting and uplifting podcasts or a motivational video for some free inspiration. Go for a walk outside. The natural and fresh air will be very soothing and also can boost your mood and energy.
6) Live in the present
Probably you had a few fails in the past. Maybe you mess up and did some silly stuff. Stop beating yourself up, it’s okay. We’ve all made mistakes and failed at something at a point in our life. But often times we become stuck by living in the past lamenting over the failures we’ve had, not because you failed at something for the first or second time you’ve tired it, doesn’t mean you are a failure.
Look at your life see where you are and where you want to go. Do not worry about your circumstances, your many failures or your lack of knowledge. Remember your dreams and goals keep working on them, make a plan and work towards it every day. Because at the end of the day it does not matter what happened to you or what you did wrong. But is what you are going to do about it! That is what really matters.
However, do not get caught up by living in the future either because it can cause as much harm has living in the past especially if you are not achieving things as you have planned them. This can lead to frustration and overwhelm.
Therefore create and maintain a balance, ” be happy in the now with a clear vision for the future”. You must have goals, but your happiness cannot be tied to these goals. You must be happy before you attain them.
At the end of the day, all we really have is right now, this very moment so be present and live in it.