People including friends and family, as well as work colleagues, often come to me looking for advice on how to solve a particular problem they are experiencing, like how to lose weight or make more money. First, I have them describe how this is affecting their lives and much of a pain point they consider it to be. The simple answer? Think of a pain point as a problem, which may be either real or only perceived.
Maybe you are experiencing some struggles in your life or know someone who is, and would like to make some positive changes but not sure how to overcome these pain points.
There are four guideposts we need to consider for you to begin leveraging pain to create more joy in your life.
You are not Alone
Life is full of ups and downs…PERIOD!!
However, sometimes when we are going through a difficulty situation we tend to get catch up into it, thinking that we are the only one experiencing this. Cheer up you are not alone!
One of the best things you can do, is to reach out, this may be a way out of your comfort zone, especially if its something personal, but, can be very helpful. Most times others are experiencing the same thing or a similar situation.
Talk to a friend or family member if you don’t have any find a community, listen to their stories, find someone you can talk to.
When you open up you will realize that you are not the only one who is facing this this, then you will get tips and advice that others found helpful. Now you can find comfort in knowing that you are not alone, you can start implementing these ideas, solve your problems and now you are so happy overcome your situation all you want to do is help someone else.
Shift Your Mindset
Practice mindfulness and make the pain act as your tour guide. Ask yourself, “What gifts has this pain brought to me?” This simple act of questioning will transform your mentality to a new way of thinking about the pain. A mindset of gratitude allows you to shift your focus away from the pain and toward the joy that you are striving to achieve. When we change our mindset, we change the outcome.
Consider Your Personal Background History
Your childhood or family’s background history can make a difference in how well you learned to be resilient. If your background history taught you that only perfect results like straight A’s or making the varsity team are good enough, it might make it difficult for you to take chances and learn new skills in adulthood. Review your family’s history and consider what message you received about success or failure. The more insight you gain into how your childhood may be informing your present circumstances, the more empowered you will be to make positive changes today.
The Key is Education
We’ve all heard the phrase, “Knowledge is power,” but in this case, it’s true. You can proactively seek out education. Learn about positive thinking and your innate psychological abilities to leverage pain to fuel personal growth. There are many avenues to gain knowledge; you aren’t restricted to taking a college class to get more educated. Read online articles on the subject, or sign up for a weekend seminar to gain more related education. Search your area and see if there is a meetup you can join, or watch an online video.
According to a 2015 study published in Psychology Today, people actually have a mental need to accept and leverage pain in order to be happy. Stop thinking of pain as a roadblock. Instead, recognize its real value as a paving stone that lines the way to a happier tomorrow for you and your loved ones.